very sad song… emo
Losing love? Losing faith?
Every relationship has its ups and downs. Every human is selfish at times. How do you gauge how much your partner loves you? How do we tell who loves who more?
Tonite, I have been told that my love has decreased. Has it? I wouldn’t think so. No point was proven. I admit I took a step back recently. My selfishness came into play here. As mentioned in my previous post, I couldn’t feel you. Then I start to wonder am I the only one working for this relationship? Do you love me enough? Have you gotten too comfortable in this relationship? Have I spoilt you too much?
FYI, I adore spoiling you. I adore seeing you happy. All I asked is for some respect and attention to me. There were times you made me doubt my self worth, and that is not a good feeling. I know u’re trying, I can tell and I appreciate it.
I thought our relationship has stablished and reached a stage whereby I can start to focus more on work. Maybe by doing so, you feel I’m not doing as many things or paying you as much attention as before?
But I want and need you to know baby. By having me put in every little effort into this relationship proves that I still love you and want to make this relationship last for as long as it can. From picking you up from work, buying you herbal drinks, helping you in research, bringing you to eat food you’ve been craving for, planning staycations and trips, remembering stuff u said from running out of masks, things in your want list, etc etc… They are all bits ad pieces of my love for you.
It takes 2 hands to clap, I alone can’t make it work, have it back to how we used to be or make things even better than they were. Wanting to put in no effort into a relationship means you are not willing to fight for it, you’ve given up on it, and that it doesn’t matter whether it works out or not anymore. If we have reached such a stage of ignorance, then what is the point of this relationship? Who isn’t tired at times? We all are at some point in time. But we suck it up, hope for the better and work on it.
I’m sorry I made you feel this way. I will work on it, but I need you to be alongside me, walking with me hand in hand in this path.
I can’t feel it these few days… I don’t know wats wrong. Am I being needy just bcos i’m sick? Is this a new transition that I have to adapt to? Or is there something wrong? I don’t know.
wassup?!
i haven’t been writing much lately, busy at work. i may be passing one of my projects over soon. i don’t know if i shld be happy or sad frankly. cos i’ve tried so hard for this project, its like my baby. i try so hard, but at times i feel like giving up. well, i did hit my kpi, but its still below my own personal target. well, what to do, its upper mgt’s call. damn tat stupid ang moh who’s gonna take over it. pui!!
then… boss asked me to take on a new portfolio last wk. challenging, its our core biz. i haven’t had time to think through n come up w an action plan yet, i’ve got no time!! but i have to soon.
this article’s gonna be all abt work, hahahhaaa.
i attended a seminar today… its by this swedish company called mag+. they have these e-publishing tools on the tablet market which is wayyyyy cool! i’m gonna ask my designer to download it n try it out. gonna loan an ipad frm IT dept n play with it, hehehee. i’m still a tech geek at heart :P ohhh, as the seminar was held at pan pacific orchard, we had our lunch at 10 on claymore. sk is sooo jealous, muahahaha. sadly, they didnt have my fav dessert for lunch.. bread n butter puddinggggg :(
it’s not 2 years yet, but almost there… happy 1.5 years anniversary baby!!
from “stars & vines”
an almost fucked up birthday week
i don’t know if its jinxed, but something always goes wrong, at least for the last year and this year. things just don’t seem to go smooth, they’ll cock up, we’ll fight. as much as we both try to hold in our tempers, but shit still happened. as hard as i try, shit happened. no matter what i do, shit happened.
i don’t know what else to do now. its sad to hear that u think things will be better if u didn’t come back. that i should prep myself for things to end. i don’t like it when u mention break up, whether if its a joke or not. i don’t understand why we have to keep harping on these negative things. am i not doing enough?
gonna get my hands on one of these plushies.
so cute. makes me happy just looking at it :)
Movie - Touch. Looks good :)
6 stages of a relationship
Which stage is your relationship at now?
1. Getting to know you - We are on our best behaviour as we get to know each other and start dating. You may find yourself withholding negative traits in yourself to give the best impression, or try to shape yourself to please your potential partner. This stage may or may not include a sexual element. We might start to make assumptions in an attempt to understand our partner – and be surprised or upset when she does not always agree with our views.
2. Romance – The “high” phase of feeling that you are merging with your partner and feeling like you have a lot in common, that you are completely understood, accepted, loved and appreciated. Probably also a lot of exciting, hot sex. To maintain this you may find that you are trying to maintain an artificially positive image, rather than actually being yourself.
3. Conflict – One day, you wake up and realise that your partner is not the person that you thought she was. She behaves in a way you don’t understand. You have a disagreement over something that seems fundamental. You have countless disagreements over things that seem unimportant. You feel betrayed. She may be going through the same experience too. This is inevitable because no two people are identical. Conflict is a normal and healthy part of any relationship if we can deal with them and find a space in our relationships to deal maturely and sensitively to each other’s needs.
Some couples don’t survive this phase because:
a) They may not be compatible – The “getting to know you” phase might have been so short that they did not realise that the differences in character, values, goals and lifestyles might be so far apart they cannot be resolved .
b) Either partner does not have the knowledge and skills to resolve conflicts and may choose to walk away rather than work through it. Or the style of fighting is so destructive and painful that breaking up seems to be the only solution.
c) Partners didn’t take the time to build understanding, respect and admiration for each other.
4. Acceptance – The calm after the storm. Couples who have been together for several years may experience a deep sense of stability, happiness and affection that is combined with an acceptance of partner as a separate human being with differences, faults, strengths and virtues. We are able to use conflicts to understand ourselves, and to see the connection with past experiences.
5. Commitment – At this stage, couples make deliberate choices about the relationship and being responsible for them. We are able to let go of comparison to the “ideal” relationship and instead celebrate a relationship that will have its ups and downs, but where pain and problems are more than compensated by the many times when it is also right, happy and satisfying. At this stage, partners learn to seek ways to compromise with their different needs and goals. Agreements may be made and possibly broken, but the relationship can be sustained if there is trust and willingness to keep working to recover from the problems.
6. Collaboration – At this stage we are ready to create shared meaning in our relationships. This can take the form of supporting each other’s goals, or creating joint projects.
*SK thinks we’re now at stage 4, the acceptance level :)
